Wednesday, September 30, 2015

My Humorous Monolouge


JohnsL_Comedy from Kapaa Middle School MEDIA on Vimeo.



These are my comedy grade results. Meh...
Well, Well, Well then, what do we have here... Oh, wait- It's NOT Hat Man... I was expecting him in my lair... (I've kidnapped his daughter, if you see him...) ANYWAY- In the comedy project, (Incase you were wondering, even though there is a GIANT COMEDY VIDEO RIGHT THERE! Wathc it if you haven't) I have learned a bundle of stuff. (Bushel? Barrel? Ton? Gallon? Cubic Centimeter? I'm not good at volume measurements.) I have learned how to make something actually funny! Yeah! I was not really able to do this before! I also learned how to trip convincingly, (Practice makes perfect!) fail at opening doors, and how to place some creative angles. (Leading lines, whatever, you know the drill. I think...) Oh, yeah, and do some very fast edits. I also earned how to properly deliver a comedic monologue, and all of the grade requirements. (I don't think I'll be using the latter...) (Wow! A lot of parentheses today!) That's pretty much it, since I already knew how to use IMovie, and how to use a camera better.
No one voted I had the funniest one :(

So, padding. No no no, not what you put on beds to make them fluffier, what you put on VIDEO CLIPS to make THEM fluffier. Wait- did I say fluffier? I meant softer. Softer? Safer? Whatever? Anyway, padding is basically a few seconds after you start and before you begin acting, and after you stop acting before you end. It's used because if you stop filming the second you stop acting, it will get a little cut off at the end/beginning. It also helps when editing, just in case you need ONE MORE SECOND! NRRGH! Uh- um- excuse me- gotta go- turning into hulk- bye now-

ANYWAY... A couple troubles I had with the filming was that I had to film at night, because I didn't have time in the day, so most of the shots were DARK  Well, not SUPER dark, but kinda dark. So I fixed that with a couple edits in IMovie. A couple things I did good were the monologue, except that first fuzzy part, and the trips. I don't know if anyone told you, but I apparently am the MASTER of tripping. Like, it seems real. (I may be over-exaggerating, but I think I did do well on those.) I also forgot to check out a camera several times... I think I could improve by getting a couple desk lamps when it's too dark, and perhaps my acting? I don't know about the acting thing though... Anyway, to discuss the results, Most people thought I did like epically well, a few thought I was good, and 2 people thought my video was bad. I guess I'll have to kidnap their daughters (if they have any) too, and hold them hostage with Hat Man's. No one thought mine was the funniest though. :( It's fine though. The pie chart shows percentile of anonymous percentile of other people's comedy skits, (In other words, blah blah blah, a lot of confusing words, blah blah blah.) 

Anyway, my plan is BELOW...
-Linden

Wednesday, September 16, 2015

Comedy Writing

Soooooo... Hello and welcome back to once again, for like the 15th time or something (I lost track) to a new project. This one has to do with comedy, (The only art I have trouble with, and this is a serious statement, unlike the usual sarcastic ones) but I won't bore you with the details just yet- I'll save it for later. Anyway, it is important to have a sense of humor because you can always make the most of a bad situation, or make a good situation even better. (wait- did I just jump to a different topic without explaining first? weird...) For example, say you get 3 cavities at the dentist or something, you could say "I knew I shouldn't have eaten that tooth-eating-mold!" (Wow that was the worst joke ever, but you get the point.) Or say things are going great, you could pop an awesome one-liner and leave everyone laughing their faces off. For example, my brother (who has a great sense of humor) popped a joke the other day while we were discussing random topics, and we all laughed a ton. I cannot write the joke unfortunately, because it is way better said then read. But it was good.

Anyway, I have created my very own "Joke", and just in case you find yourself in the same situation, here are:
Linden's 5 Tips on how to Make a Joke

So, tip number 1. If you are stuck on step one, you should just think of a random thing that happened that day, and exaggerate, poke fun at, or just generally make it funnier. Tip number 2! If you can't poke fun at something that happened that day, just make something up. Such as; "So, a funny thing happened the other day..." etc. Tip 3... If you can't make up something like that, just do a bunch of one liners, or some random stuff. Personally, I prefer the latter. Tip 4!? Make up your own ORIGINAL jokes! If you tell someone a joke based off of the internet, or a joke from the internet, chances are the've already heard a similar joke, and it's WAAAAY less funny. Tip 5! (Finally!) Punny isn't always funny! To make a joke based off of a pun, make sure it's either exaggerated, or actually funny. Test the joke out with friends or family before you tell it to other people.

HAHAHAHAHAHA.gif (Just a laugh GIF.)
Ok. So now here is my comedic monologue. (Or, "Joke", as I called it before...) It came as a stroke of inspiration during one of Mr. Sanderls' lectures. Basically it goes something like this. (A word-for-word copy of what's on my plan) :  I had the most persistent cousin ever. He was like Einstein's definition of insanity. I bet, if you looked it up, he would be there. Whenever he messed something up, he would just do it right over again exactly the same. (Trip!) “Ok let’s try that again” (Trip!) “I know how to do this!” (Trip! Trip! Trip!...) He was once stuck trying to go up a down escalator for 3 whole days! I don’t know how he does it. He never does anything differently than he does before, so whenever he does something right, it’s a big celebration and it’s the only thing we ever tell him to do. We once tried to take him to a therapist once, but the meeting went something like this: “So, why are you here.” “Because my family made me come here.” “But why?” “Because” “Why” “Because.” It went on for hours. Either the therapist had the same problem, or he was trying to use up our time... So there you have it. I think it's funny because, well, what sane person would try to keep doing something exactly the same and expect it to work that time?! (Answer: None. That's why I said he was like Einstein's definition of insanity.) Also, the visuals are funny because you see him (me) tripping, doing the same thing over and over again, and slamming into doors over and over. (Don't worry. It won't hurt. I hope...) Also, the last part is funny because a therapist's sessions are timed, so therapists sometimes do things like that (not exactly like that) to waste time, and this particular therapist saw the perfect opportunity. (BTW: I will play all of the parts.)

Well there you go,
-Linden

Ps: If you read a previous post, called "Ok, Who Spilled The Ink?" you should be able to read this.
Thumbs up to whoever can find this!

Wednesday, September 2, 2015

Motivational Poster

Welcome back! After like 7 days of not posting anything, (which in normal for this blog) a new post is underway! Remember the project I mentioned in the previous post? You SHOULD remember unless you totally skipped out on the previous blog post like a slacker. (Can you slack on something no one told you to do? I need to know.) If you did skip out, however, it's the Motivational Poster. You know, Blah Blah Blah, Just do it, etc.  Anyway, the requirements are 6 layers: Manifesto, a couple of Personal Quotes, Krazy Kerning (Of both text layers, all the way across the page), 4 Photos, (Three symbolic images, and MY FACE: A portrait...) and also a Triatic color scheme and blending options on my text layers, adjustment layers on my images, and Visual Balance.
Text layers, (without effects)
Top Left: Quotes. Rest: Manifesto.
Images, (without effects)

So, you're probably wondering how I made the poster, (bottom) I shall now tell you. First, I had to create the Manifesto, (Find in the previous blog post! Shameless self advertising FTW) and put it into a brand new Photoshop document. (You know the drill- file, new, 8.5 by 11 inches, etc.) Then I did the same with the personal quotes that I created myself, (On the poster, they are the gold text.) I then Kerned the text to fit the screen precisely, and fitted the Manifesto next to the personal quotes. After that was all said and done, I imported and arranged in an aesthetically pleasing manner, the three Symbolic Images, (Once again found in the previous post- You know what? Why don't you just read it...) and a portrait of myself. (Taken by Jason Hoy) I then used layer modification techniques (AKA: a lot of long words that I just use to look smart ) on the text to make it gold, green, and blue, (My Triadic Color Scheme) using the outlines, glow, bevel and emboss, and other stuff to incorporate the scheme. Finally, I used adjustment layers (Above the photos, below the text) to make the photos fit with the color scheme and make them BLUE! Blue as a- a... um... a. . . a Blueberry? I don't know many things that blue. It's almost blinding... Well, anyway, then with a couple of touch-ups, it was done.

So, I'd say that the biggest challenge I had to face was being absent for about a day. When I came back we were supposed to be done kerning- but I hadn't even started. So I had to work really fast and come in for lunch to finish the kerning so it fit the entire screen. I think I did pretty well... What do you guys think? One of the hardest things with the kerning however, was getting the manifesto so it was on the side of the quotes. I manages it in the end by pressing enter when I ran out of room with the text. Otherwise it was pretty easy, probably because I had worked with photoshop before. If you would like to see the finished poster, it is blown up (not literally) at the bottom.

Adios Amigos
-Linden
Final Motivational Poster!!!